Three strikes and you’re out.

That’s baseball right?

While I’m not American and haven’t watched that
much baseball, I do know that much.

Unfortunately, many of us confuse the game of
baseball with the game of life.

I know I have.

Let me explain: Sometimes we make mistakes.
Sometimes we fail. Sometimes stuff just doesn’t
go the way we planned.

For instance, let’s say you try a new project
but fail to get it done because of time commitments.

So you try again, only to be overwhelmed once more
with how much you have to do (now you start to
wonder why you ever started in the first place)

Then you try one more time to get the project
over the line (perhaps it’s to lose weight, start
a part time business, spend more time connecting
with the love of your life)… only to bomb out
once more.

Now you are less likely to have time challenges
if you follow the principles available here
but the truth is most people would give up at that
stage.

Psychologically, they turn their back on trying
again and head back to the dugout.

They stop trying… stop dreaming… stop trying
to learn and grow.

These are the people who say, “It’s all too hard”
or “That will never work… I tried it and it
didn’t work for me”…

You get the idea.

And sadly, they end up just chugging along, making
ends meet, doing what they need to do to survive,
never really happy with how their life is… secretly
wishing things could be different but never having
the courage to try again.

After my first business venture went under. After
my first property development venture went south.
After I got fired twice in 8 months. After I
struggled for months with my consulting business,
it would have been easy for me to throw in the towel.

But no matter what happened. No matter how many
times I screwed up, no matter
what my history suggested…

I never stopped dreaming about running a
successful business, being financially free and
making a difference in the lives of other people.

Most successful business people I have met have
had the same experiences.

Now, I still have a while to go before I call
myself a successful businessman but here’s the
thing:

If you have 3 strike outs in
business, in love, or in life in general…

YOU ARE NOT OUT

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO GO BACK TO THE DUGOUT

YOU ARE STILL IN THE GAME

The only time you are OUT is when you decide to be
out.

Remember that – as long as your heart is still
beating, you are still in the game… if you
choose to be.

And that’s the key thing to remember. Life is
all about choice.

So if you’re struggling right now…

If you’ve failed and can’t seem to get things
working…

Don’t give up.

By all means, do something different…

Learn how to master your time (it’s the only
thing we all have the same amount of everyday)

Discover how to change your attitude...

Master how to handle rejection…

Focus on getting through those tough times…

And keep looking for new avenues to succeed.

But whatever you do, don’t give up after 3 strikes.

Because the gold is sitting somewhere after the
fourth strike.

To your success,

Niro

I’ve been down and out before… many times than
I care to remember.

I broke my arm badly a few years ago and after
expensive surgery with metal screws and plates, I was
told I would never get full movement back in my arm.

I didn’t listen.

3 months later, I walked into my surgeon’s office
flexing my arm like a proud bodybuilder showing a full
range of motion and then some.

…. I was told that I would probably fail my third year at
university because I missed so much of it due to illness.

I didn’t listen.

By the end of that year, my name appeared in the national
newspaper as one of the top achievers in my course.

… My grandfather who suffered from Alzheimer’s went for
a walk one day… and got lost. The police came back later to
say it was getting dark and it was impossible to find him
until morning.

I didn’t listen.

I kept driving around – looking…

And then I found him… 2 hours later, cold, shivering and
disoriented.

I was told later that if I had not found him that night, he’d
have probably died overnight from exhaustion, starvation
and the cold.

…. Just over 2 years ago, I was broke, destitute and could have
been homeless if not for the support of my parents. Bankruptcy
seemed like the only option.

I didn’t listen.

Within 6 months I’d cleared the bulk of my debts, gotten
my creditors off my back and was moving forwards again.

Bankruptcy be damned!

Ok, so what’s the point Niro?

Simple… and this is something that many of us struggle with

Bad stuff happens to good people.

There are a lot of people out there who say that if you just
think good stuff, you’ll only get good stuff.

Horse’s ass!

Bad stuff happens. Accept it.

And when you are down and out… when things are at
their worst, there will be people (perhaps with good intentions)
who tell you to just give up and accept it.

Don’t listen.

Don’t give up.

Don’t throw in the towel.

Here’s the truth – if something bad happens to you, it’s because
you are supposed to learn something like perhaps how to handle rejection… and then do something.

That’s it. There isn’t anything more magical than that.

Look, at times I know that things happen that are completely
out of your control… and it sucks.

I lost a close friend of mine a few years ago. He went to bed
and just never woke up. I was holding the books he wanted to
borrow off me that morning when I found out.

It sucked! It wasn’t my fault… and it certainly wasn’t his.

But it was no reason for me to get all grumpy… or think life
sucks and allow myself to just be pushed around by the
whims of fate.

No way!

You look for the lesson – you get smarter and you
get stronger!

From my friend who died so young, I learned that
life is fragile.

Value it.

From my broken arm, I learned that your body can
break.

Look after it.

From my grandfather who got lost, I learned how
valuable your health is.

Treasure it.

When I was told, I’d probably fail my university degree,
I learned that the system was flawed.

Screw it.

And when I was facing bankruptcy, I learned that my
ego, my greed and my impatience were a triple threat
to my happiness, my wealth and my relationships.

So I’m trying to squash them (I’ll let you know when I
get there )

Yet from all of this, I learned the most valuable lesson
of all.

Never give up, not matter how tough things get. You
can get through it even if you initially think you can’t.

Believe me! Persistence is the key.

In the words of Winston Churchill’s great speech…

But for everyone, surely, what we have gone through
in this peril — I am addressing myself to the
School — surely from this period of ten months,
this is the lesson:

Never give in. Never give in. Never, never, never,
never — in nothing, great or small, large or petty
– never give in, except to convictions of honour and
good sense. Never yield to force. Never yield to the
apparently overwhelming might of the enemy.

My final thoughts are this:
Bad stuff happens to us all. It sucks but it’s true. But
what determines the course of your life is what you
do about it.

If you constantly suffer from a bad attitude towards
life, then check out my post “7 tips on how to change
your attitude from negative to positive”

Some guy once said that “all good things
must come to an end.”

He was an idiot!

Why? Because he only gave us half the truth.

The second half is more important.

“All bad times must also come to an end… eventually”.

That’s it from me,

Niro

PS: If you think this rant can help someone going
through tough times, do them a favour and share
this on facebook, twitter on stumbleupon. Thanks!

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Being in a rut stinks! You feel like nothing is happening for you. Sometimes the harder you try the worse it gets… and the further backwards you go.

Sometimes, the best thing to do when you’re feeling like that…. is to stop working so hard. I know that sounds weird but believe me.

Take a break. Revive!

Then start looking at what opportunities you have to move forwards… opportunities that are within reach.

Sun Tzu, author of “The Art of War” and a gifted military strategist was once quoted as saying…

“Opportunities multiply as they are seized”

… and let’s take a moment to look at that quote in a little more detail.

I’ll use my own experience as an example…

When I was trying to get myself back off the floor after failing badly, I decided to begin a consulting business. However, I had no leads. So I chatted with some friends and asked if I could consult for them.

One of them said yes.

So I took him up on it. Now I had an income.

I then asked if he could refer people to me in exchange for a cut. He said yes.

Now my income started to grow.

Then I started looking at networking functions where I might be able to find potential clients.

I found a few. But no new clients.

I persisted.

And then at one networking function, I met someone who said he would love my consulting services. Within 2 weeks, his company became my biggest client.

Now I had a great income.

I then started asking myself what else I could do. I started adding more value to my services. Then my biggest client asked if I could come on board as part of the company’s management team to build the company.

I said yes.

Now, I’m working very hard to build this company up and I’m having a ball.

If you get what I’m saying here, you have everything you need to get yourself out of a rut, take advantage of the opportunities that are right before you and get yourself moving forwards again.
Here is what I hope you take away from this post

• When you are stuck in a rut, take a break and revive.
• Look for the opportunities that are right in front of you.
• Persist – it may not always work the first time but hang in there.
• Focus on continually improving yourself and your skills.
• When opportunities come, seize them. They will lead on to bigger and better things.

I applied these 5 principles to get myself moving fowards again. Try them yourself and leave me a comment about what you think.

… And if you think this post could help others, please share it on twitter, facebook and stumbleupon.

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I was sitting in a coffee shop yesterday reading an article
which was talking about fleas.

(Yeah, I know what you’re thinking… Niro, don’t you have
anything better to do? That’s a story for another time)

Anyway, what I found out was amazing.

Did you know that even though fleas can fly to almost any
height….

Even though they are some of the biggest pests going around…

They can be put in a jar and left there without a lid on the jar.

How?

If you are good enough to capture a flea in a jar (and no I don’t
know how to that)…. and you put a clear lid on the jar, the flea
tries to get out.

It keeps jumping up to get out… only to keep whacking it’s head
on the glass jar

WHACK!

WHACK!

WHACK!

Eventually the flea gives up and stop jumping so high.

In fact, it only jumps to just below the height of the jar so it does not
whack it’s head.

You can then remove the clear lid but the flea will not jump any higher.

It continues to believe that it cannot get out of the jar… and therefore
never tries.

The barrier is mental – not physical.

So let me ask you a question…

How many perceived glass ceilings do you have preventing you from
achieving your potential?

Do you have a glass ceiling about how much you can earn… how much
love and intimacy you can enjoy in your relationship… how much energy
and vitality you can have in your life?

Personally, I had a glass ceiling on my income which held me back for years!

I did not believe I could earn a high six figure income in a short period of time.
And other people kept telling me just how hard it was. And then of course, I
was living under the guise that money does not grow on trees.

I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.

So how do we break through that glass ceiling?

Visualisations and affirmations certainly have their place.
(If you want to know more about the right way to do affirmations, see my
post Positive Affirmations – how to affirm yourself for success.)

So does positive thinking.

But do you know what I find works better than anything?

Action.

Action combined with the right knowledge to be exact.

Because once you start seeing results…

Once you start walking around the block and you see the weight coming off….

Once you start practising your internet marketing skills and you see sales
coming in…

Once you start going out with your partner at least once a week and you see
the passion you once had reignited….

Once you start seeing progress in that one area you focus on…

Your mindset shifts instantly!

That’s what happened for me when I started turning my life and my business around.

The truth this – nothing beats progress (that you can see) when it comes to breaking
through smashing through those perceived barriers.

And there’s no better way of getting results that coming the right knowledge
with the right action.

To helping you live your best life,

Niro

PS: Leave me a comment below and let me know you break through barriers
that are stopping you

PPS: If you think this post is valuable, please share on twitter, facebook and
Stumbleupon.

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Roger Federer, defending Wimbledon champion and the greatest of all time very nearly lost in the first round of Wimbledon this year. He came back from the very brink to win the match and as he admitted, “I won this match that I should have lost.”

How does someone so great survive and snatch victory when defeat seems assured?

This is the one characteristic of Federer that is so underated – his ability to survive and keep fighting until the very end. And this is what we can learn from the great man.

How many times in life have you been faced with tough challenges, overwhelming circumstances and things not going right? What do you do when that happens?

Every New Year’s eve, one of the top 3 most common resolutions is to lose weight. We go and buy the new training gear, perhaps sign up at the gym and get started. Yet very quickly, most of us give up on our new routine as “life gets in the way.” But a few persist, regardless of the challenges and a few months later they are enjoying their new found health and fabulous looking bodies while the rest of us look forward to the next New Year’s eve so we can start all over again.

Does this sound familiar? Have you started something in the past only to give up when things got tough? I know I have – many times unfortunately. However, the great ones, the ones that achieve the success they are looking for, never give up.

The ability to persist in the face of massive challenge, adversity and circumstances out of our control is the number one characteristic that distinguishes the ones who make it from the also rans.

When we set ourselves a goal in life, we must also resolve that no matter what, as long as we still want to achieve that goal, we will stick with it until we achieve it. Sadly very few of us make this decision. Most of us want a goal and are willing to work for it until things get hard, but that’s when the rubber meets the road. That’s when you know how much you want the goal – when you’re willing to still go after it even when everything seems to be going against you.

Federer says that he felt that everything was going against him, he could not play the way he wanted to play and his opponent just had it all over him. So he said the only thing he could do was hang in there and fight as hard as he could.

What about you? Do you resolve to hang in there and fight as hard as you can until things turn around? I know that isn’t always easy to do – as I said, I’ve given up many times before. But now I don’t give up anywhere near as often and that’s made a big difference to the results I’m achieving in my life.

So how do you keep going when things get tough? You look at your reasons why you wanted to achieve that goal in the first place. If your reasons are strong enough, you will find a way. I don’t know exactly what Federer’s reasons are but I know that he feels that Wimbledon is his tournament and nobody is going to take it away from him. He knows that if he lost in that first round match, he would have to endure the pain of that loss for a whole year. There was no way he was going to face that. So he fought!

What are your reasons? Why would you get back up when you get knocked down? I’ve heard the quote: “Success is falling down 7 times but getting up 8.” However, the only way you are going to get up is if you have a big enough reason. Remember, the size of a challenge is limited but the size of your reasons can be unlimited.

So next time you go after a goal, make sure you know exactly why you want to achieve it. And then decide that no matter what you will persist until you achieve your goal. Change your strategy if you need to but never give up on your goal!

Leave me a comment below and let me know what you think this post. What do you think separates the successful from those who never make it?

To never giving up,

Niro Thambipillay

PS: If you liked this article, please share it on Twitter, Facebook or Stumbleupon. I’d really appreciate it

“If you enjoy the process, it’s your dream. … If you are enduring the process, just desperate for the result, it’s somebody else’s dream”
- Salma Hayek

I absolutely love this quote and the wisdom it contains. If all of us could focus more on doing something we enjoy and following our passion, then our lives would be so much better. I am so guilty of not adhering to this and ending up frustrated and miserable. In this short video, I talk about how following Salma Hayek’s philosophy could lead to a life more enjoyable and more rewarding than you ever thought. I hope you enjoy it and please leave me a comment below….

Let me know what you think of this video and leave me a comment below. I’d really appreciate it if you shared it on twitter and facebook as well.

I have to admit, I’ve always been a fan of Sylvester Stallone’s Rocky movies – primarily because of their inspirational messages. This video highlights a message that I think is more pertinent today than ever before.

Rocky’s son blames his dad for not getting what he wants from life. We’ve all been there at some time in our life – looking for something to blame out of pure frustration because things are not going the way we want. I know I’ve been there on more than one occasion.

However, as natural as the inclination to blame other people and events is, it will never ever make any difference to our situation. Playing the blame game is like sitting in a rocking chair – it gives us something to do but it never gets us anywhere. In reality, it does not even make us feel good. The only solution is to take responsibility for the situation and move forwards, but why don’t we do that? Because that requires courage and true courage is rare commodity these days. As someone once told me, true courage is that little voice that says at night, “Tomorrow, I will try again… one more time!”

Stallone addresses this very smartly with his line, “If you know what you are worth, then go and get what you are worth – but you have to be able to take the hits.” This is just so true. He goes on to say, “There ain’t nobody who can hit as hard as life, but it don’t matter how hard you can hit. What matters is how hard you can get hit and keep moving forwards – how much you can take and keep moving forwards.”

Whenever, I’m going through tough times, I always remember these words: “Life is about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forwards.” One of my mentors says it differently – he says, “When you’re going through hell, keep going. Because if you stop, you end up in hell”. In other words, when you’re going through tough times, you must have the courage to persevere and get through. Otherwise, you’re just going to end up stuck in a rut, frustrated and looking for things to blame.

“Tough times don’t last but tough people do” – often the key factor determining your success in life is your resilience, your tenacity and your ability to persist. We’ve all heard the saying, “success is falling down 7 times but getting up 8”. The ability to be able to last through tough times is what separates the men from the boys – it’s often the single quality that is the difference between success and failure. Harrison Ford, star of the Indiana Jones and Star Wars Series said, “I knew that to succeed in this industry, I just needed to hang in there longer than everyone else.” Ford was paid $65Million for the latest Indiana Jones movie.

So go out there and strive to get what you want from life – but it is not always going to be easy and it is not always going to be smooth sailing. As J. Sidlow Baxter said, “Every opportunity has a difficulty, & every difficulty has an opportunity.” So get yourself ready for the hits and go forwards anyway!

Unfortunately, there is a whole movement out there which seems to suggest that if you just sit around and visualise success, then success will come to you easily. Nothing could be further from the truth – as Rocky says, “The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It will beat you to your knees and keep you there if you let it.”

Everyone has had their tough times and tough times will come again – the question is what will you do when they come? Will you let life beat you down or will you aim to stand up one more time? Will you allow yourself to lie on the canvas or will you get up for another round? There have been times for me, especially when I was over $109,000 in debt with no income and people suing me for money that I wanted to throw in the towel. I have to admit, I was on the canvas and I felt like lieing there.

However, no matter how tough life gets, always remember that you and you alone decide how many times you want to get back up again. You can choose to quit or you can choose to persist. I have 3 strategies that I use whenever I feel like quitting:

1. I tell myself, “I can always quit tomorrow so why not just go another round today?” It’s a silly little saying but it keeps me moving forwards and ultimately that’s all that matters
2. Another strategy I use when I’ve had a tough day is I’ll take the day off and get an early night. When I wake up in the morning, I remind myself that today is a brand new day. Whatever happened yesterday is in the past and today is a clean canvas and I get to create it anew.
3. When things are going really badly, like when I was almost on the verge of bankruptcy and I felt like the whole world was against me, I remembered saying to myself, “I might as well quit now because things are not going to be any different tomorrow.” And then I remembered thinking, “Ok, let’s say I quit and I go back to just being like everyone else… and in 50 years time when I look back at my life, would I be happy that I quit just because a few people were trying to make my life hell or would I have wanted to keep going until I got through the tough times?  That was a very easy question to answer and I persisted and I fought and I got through. Let me assure, life looks a whole lot better today. So whenever you feel like quitting, project forwards a couple decades and look back on your life. Would you wish you’d continued or are you happy that you quit? The answer is often quite easy.

Many of us have seen great sporting feats where a team or an individual was down and out; yet they found something from deep within them that turned everything around. It is these stories that we find inspirational and Rocky is a classic example of this. But why not be your own inspiration? Why not reach deep down from within yourself and inspire your own revival? After all, what do you have to lose?

Remember, this thing called life has an end – but it ends when our hearts give out and not before. And as far as I’m concerned I’m going to keep striving for what I want from life until one of the following two things happen. Either, I’m going to get what I want or I’m going to die first – it’s just that simple. How about you? Are you willing to dedicate your life to achieving something glorious or are you going to allow life “to beat you to your knees”?

What strategies do you use to bounce back from adversity? Remember, “there ain’t nobody who can hit as hard as life but it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forwards. How much you can take and keep moving forwards.”

Leave me a comment below and let me know if you think Rocky’s advice is sound and what strategies you use to get back up again when life knocks you down. I’d love to hear from you.

And finally, if you ever feel like things are getting too much, remember the famous words of Winston Churchill:  “Never, never, never, never give up!”

To bouncing back from adversity,

Niro

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